It's been awhile

Hey,

I know it has been way too long since the last blog post.  In a sense, I felt this was pointless unless I was directing at someone.  One of my close friends asked when I would ever post again.  It created another existential crises.  If one screams into the void is there anyone else to hear it?  If it is heard, is there a point?  In many ways, people from all walks of life attend to this problem when content to release themselves from ignorant bliss back to panic.  In many ways it feels like people in general live in a state of fear that way, but thats another conversation all together.

In my journeys, I have gotten from trying to adventure, question the point of adventure, and then taking a look inwards to find a solution to a slight despair that occurs when one is lost.  Of course, many of us are lost, trying to find ways to solve every problem, check everything off the bucket list and die knowing that we did all we could do with the time given.   That could mean anything from having kids, striving to do something artistic, going on adventures, finding home, having a STEM career to just having a tortoise walk around a huge house.  We all have needs that way.  It happens.

So far, I have noticed that as a doomed Jedi, I must strive to help others while I am capable of doing so.  I see no point in backing down that.  There is truth that even when screaming into the void you will hear nothing back, but I still sense hope in trying for the most part.  When there is nothing to live for or lose, one can do anything.  It's a kind of backward thinking in a way.  I guess, when one enters the void, one release can release themselves to the possibilities.

I will come again soon, and I will post more over time.

I am sorry.

The Doomed Jedi,

Kannan Aravagiri

Picnic Day

Davis holds an annual holiday called Picnic day in which festivities occur within UC Davis and is amplified throughout the town.  Every Picnic Day starts bright and early at 9 am with a parade and subsequent other events throughout the day until mid-day, where the parties start until people pass out one way or another.  It's an excuse for binge-drinking, many taking shots in the morning to satisfy the need to follow college/ Picnic Day traditions.  I am not much of a drinker, but so instead of mimosas...I had orange juice.  Most people that usually follow picnic day, due so by spiking every kind of drink imaginable, but for some reason, I just don't think there is a real point in disturbing a drink with something that deletes the taste I expect.

Maybe it's just me, but there has been a significant point where the need to get drunk is significantly decreased in comparison for the need to taste completely.  This is not saying I did not drink on this day, I did, but it's usually because of either peer pressure or another significant event, a depressing one.  Truthfully, that is one of my biggest issues I guess I have with drinking.  It's probably more often that drinking has gained a negative connotation has has had negative reinforcement throughout my time in college through significant events and from friends.  Drinking has never been a time in which happiness is there, but always a background to a slight sadness.  Drinking to socialize is okay, but drinking to get drunk is for the most part never a fun part of it.  Maybe I'm not having the "correct fun" required when drinking, but for me, I think that if you can't have fun without drinking doing what you are doing, then it is not truly fun.  This logic can be used to define what is of significance to one, and has for me in many situations.  I'm not saying my opinion on this subject is vast.  I am inexperienced with life, and its happenstances, and I do not know what to make of it.  I'm not a person though who likes to act out from substance, but likes to act out due to personal insanity, which is completely fine.  

Meh, these issues of drinking is complicated because I too had a slight drinking problem previously.  I drank mainly to repress depression and aid in insomnia.  For the most part, it didn't work, and it was horribly depressing.  In any case, alcohol can help catalyze ease in introduction or dancing, but should not be used as a crutch for either.

Moments of discussion...

Broken Promises and The Weeks so far

         Okay...this is a heads up on how my reddit fast is going.  Mother of god...its actually not bad.  However, the only reason again is that I have been readjusting to youtube and facebook.  Again...however, those are starting to lose their spark.  I have noticed that slowly the originality I found in going on youtube after researching on reddit, is now gone.  The way youtube is formatted made it so that actually trying to find new things on the net is nearly impossible because youtube only uses subscriptions to make sure you only focus on what you normally go on.  However, this is one of the limitations of web searching.
        There is a point where once you settled, there is a layer that starts forming around your experience.  This layer is mainly dictated by what you once searched for during your stay and gradually evolves once you search enough, but the early sediments are very stable, and very geared to one side.  In many ways, it is extremely annoying, and makes me yearn to try to learn more, but alas I am slightly stuck on certain things.   I can't tell whether it's because I have gotten so much in, or that I'm jsut not looking in the right places.
        Now, I'm counting the days until June 15th, where I delete my facebook and stop going on youtube.  Sadly I must confess that I broke one of the rule..and as of now I will try to continue on strong.  Admittedly it gives off a few more questions that I didn't expect, but it delves into how one can limit one's sexual needs in response to what is happening.   Truth Trying to find a way to realize the Jedi in my is something I must practice to try to be a better person overall.  Overall, sexual needs kind of suck even though it's awesome at the same time....The days are counting...TIME TO BE STRONG.

Phone Culture and Groupings

Lately, I believe everyone has noticed that people go on their phone all the time.  Whether it's because they are bored, they are expecting something, someone is expecting something of them, something is happening, all of it is combined to form this amalgam of added pressure to check and reassure oneself using their phone.   In many cases, it's a reassurance of being part of a collective that forces oneself to check their phone/smart-phone on the daily.  However, if you are already part of a collective, there is a moment of slight awkwardness when you check your phone during an outing with a group of friends.  Especially at a bar, it is quite the embarrassment and quite a show of disregard because it proves that whatever conversation or happening on text is more important than the physical being.  One bar decided to try to end that streak by creating a pint glass that has a small divot on the bottom side of the glass that enables one to insert his/her phone into it.  Thereby, the phone acts as a third stool leg so that the glass does not tip over.  Of course, they literally carve the divot into the glass, so I believe they only wish to attack Iphone users as though android users are immaculate in their usage of their phone, but I digress.   The idea is this, the brewing company is trying to reassure that the customer is reassured by the people around, and break away from this need to be wound up with their phone.  I believe its a good step, a very shallow and unconvincing step, but a slight breach towards a culture that needs to recognize community no totally through technology but by necessary human interaction.  I know that greensandmachines might have a disagreement with it, but I still believe it is a worthy addition.

Those are my thoughts anyhow.

I hope you all have a great day.

P.S.: This the glass article.